Rocket prides itself on having a passion for nonsense that's nearly as strong as our passion for product. That's why we're taking a break from talking about Terraform and debating Docker solutions to address a *very* serious issue here at Rocket HQ...
In many cases, experiencing something once is enough... especially when it comes to animal invasions. But for us at Rocket Insights, once is, apparently, not enough. The first time a squirrel invaded our Newburyport office, two of our founding partners were working quietly on the third floor of our Newburyport headquarters when a little gray head popped up at the top of the stairs. What followed was only a hint of the future chaos squirrels would bring to this office.
The squirrel bounded over to our snack corner and the partners immediately dropped what they were doing to start stomping and shouting at it. Fortunately, their fear tactic worked and the squirrel escaped out an open window. We’d won the battle, but not the war.
A few months later, another squirrel snuck into the office. This one was especially vengeful. It got in through a chimney early one morning and tore apart our first floor, laying waste to a bunch of potted plants before breaking out through a window
With the score now 1-1, Rocket-Squirrels, one Rocketeer took decisive action and plugged up the office fireplace with a sheet of plywood. Problem, solved. Or so we foolishly thought
The “Chimney Tornado Situation” began when our Head of Marketing, Kristin, was in a meeting with none other than the CEO of Dept (Rocket is part of Dept) and she heard a scream from outside the door. Less than five feet away, our Social Media Manager, Imogene, was freaking out HARD. A member of the finance team, Erin, was laughing. And the office's fireplace was a giant mess. Kristin dubbed this the Chimney Tornado Situation.
A third squirrel invasion was underway at HQ. Fortunately, Erin and Imogene were there to defend the castle. On the call with our CEO, Kristin had to explain why there were two grown adults screaming in the background.
The night before the chimney tornado, a fluffy-tailed, soulless-eyed rodent got stuck between the plywood and the chimney. The two people still in the office agreed it would be a “tomorrow problem” and let it sit overnight.
As Kristin was starting her call, Imogene began to unscrew the plywood fireplace plug. At this point it should be known that, if there’s one thing you should know about Imogene, it’s that Imogene is terrified of squirrels. So Erin joined her for psychological support (and muscle) and fifteen minutes later, the “situation” hit the fan.
Now unscrewed, the plywood fell down and a whole lot of SOMETHING came tumbling down. Frightened and in shock, Imogene fell back, cowering in the corner. Erin started laughing maniacally in response to Imogene's reaction.
Imogene thought it was a pile of dead squirrels, but fortunately it was only insulation.
As the day went on, Imogene was convinced that the squirrel was still up in the chimney, but no one believed her. Because no one had visual proof that the squirrel was really back, much of the company thought that Imogene’s fear of squirrels had brought her to paranoia.
Imogene insisted that she could hear sounds coming from the chimney, so she set up a heart trap baited with the Rocket famous stroopwafel.
Finally Dave took pity on Imogene and hired a chimney team to “fix” the issue by capping the chimney. With the chimney team coming into the office and disrupting everyone hard at work, people made fun of Imogene for all the drama she caused.
But finally, as the chimney people worked on the roof, a squirrel popped out from the chimney just as the cap was about to be put on. It turned out that the squirrel really was back, and Imogene was not just a paranoid squirrel-hater. Squirrels were finally banished from the Rocket Insights headquarters - hopefully once and for all.
Imogene was finally vindicated. Dave even bought her a trophy to commemorate her terrifying experience… and ensuing victory. The taxidermy squirrel he was able to obtain for her is believed by much of the office to be the infamous squirrel itself, back once again to terrorize Imogene (and flip her off in the process).